After reading the title of this blog, you might be thinking, “How in the world could empathy play a role in sports?” If you are an athlete, you’ve likely taken the perspective, "The day I have empathy for my opponent is the day my athletic career is over." Truthfully, you may not be that far off. The majority of the greatest athletes in history succeeded because they viewed their opponent as "the dragon to be slayed.” Anyone who stepped on the opposing side of the field was an enemy. With this mindset these elite athletes have one goal: to overcome their opponent by any means necessary, show no mercy and most of all, never ever let their enemy into their heads; not before, during, or after the game. This mindset has undoubtedly created great champions. A smaller group of elite athletes however, have succeeded, excelled, and overcome opponents with a more empathic mindset. I call this class of competitors the complete athletes.
WHO IS THE COMPLETE ATHLETE?
Complete athletes understand the influential role of emotions at the individual and team level. They value empathy. They know that understanding others’ emotions and responding tacitly enables cohesive bonds between teammates. Complete athletes also respect and understand emotional fluctuations in their opponents. They play with a different frame of mind, understanding the cyclical nature of sports from victory to defeat, health to injury, streaks to slumps, pride to disappointment, and so on. Why are characteristics like understanding one’s own and others’ emotions important and effective for the complete athlete?
THE EMOTION OF THE GAME
Athletics brings out powerful emotions in us. In so doing, athletics provide the perfect platform to learn about how we express and control our emotional states. Throughout the course of competition, as in life, our emotions are constantly in flux. They fuel our every movement. Without emotions, we would be stagnant, unmotivated, and uninspired. Emotions are not free though; they cost energy. To optimize performance, complete athletes effectively manage their energy by becoming aware of and controlling their emotions. They know that wasting energy on unmanaged emotions can cost them the game, season, or even a career. This is not to say emotions are bad. In fact, suppressing our emotions would be unnatural and would also be a waste of energy. Every great coach will tell you that athletes perform best when they are inspired, passionate, and filled with emotion. Daniel Goleman provides perspective in his best-selling book Emotional Intelligence where he writes, "The goal is balance, not emotional suppression; every feeling has its value and significance."
Self-Awareness one step further - EMPATHY
Empathy is born out of self-awareness. It is the process of experiencing the same feelings or emotions as someone else and is practiced in almost every competition. Effective leadership and appropriately guided teamwork is non-existent without empathy. Beyond empathy for your teammates, empathy for your opponents, or enemies, might be even more valuable a skill. It may save you energy and provide more enjoyment. In high-level sports the guy lined up across from you shares very similar nerves, doubts, fears, excitement, and levels of preparedness. The truth is that you and he are not all that different. You both place the same value on the thrill of victory and have the same disdain for defeat. An awareness and understanding of your emotions during a game will allow you to not only conserve valuable physical, and mental energy but give you an understanding of the emotions that your opponent is, more than likely, feeling. When the final whistle blows, you certainly have different feelings than your opponent, but can share respect for the sport, competition, and efforts displayed on that day. Such mutual respect and empathic understanding between you and your opponent will allow you to, as they say, "Win with class and lose with class." Complete athletes are classy, empathic, and respectful winners no matter the score or outcome on any given day.
Stay believing,
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